R' Eliemelech Biderman related the following parable which we can learn from:

There was  a young married man who simply put, felt like a "loser". He would go to work and people would not acknowledge his presence. When he would walk on the street nobody would even stop to greet him or ask him for simple directions. Even when he arrived home, his wife and children didn't seem to care too much that he was there. He felt rather worthless and didn't really know what to do as people simply didn't seem to care that he was present. One day he saw an advertisement in the newspaper for a new type of fancy hat. He decided that if he buys this new fancy hat then people will certainly start to pay attention and notice him. He went to the store and asked for a new fancy hat. He measured the hat so it would fit perfectly, checked how it looked in the mirror and finally bought it. The old hat he had been wearing for years was ready falling apart and he decided that there is no reason to even keep it. He took the new hat out of the box and decided to wear it as opposed to carrying it home in the box. He threw out the box with the old hat and proudly walked down the street with his new hat. All of a sudden someone stopped him and asked for directions. He saw a co-worker who asked him how things were going. He then walked into his house and his wife and kids greeted him warmly. They all asked him what happened to him, he looked so different. The man pointed up towards his hat. His wife didn't understand and thought that something was wrong with his head. She asked again and got the same response. Finally the man answered and said my hat, don't you see how new it is? His wife had no idea what he was talking about. She said what hat? It is the same hat you have had for years. The man took the hat off his head and realized that he accidently had thrown out his brand new hat and was still wearing his old hat. Nothing changed about the man, except for one thing, the way he perceived himself.

How often do we fall into this same trap? We can be convinced that someone treated us wrong, insulted us or was simply unfriendly. We can convince ourselves that they think we are x, y, or z simply because that is how we perceive ourselves. In truth most of the problems start with us, and in the way we view ourselves and project ourselves.

Shabbat Shalom,

Heath